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Forwarding Report from Zummon - W.I.D.G.E.T.

About Forwarding Report from Zummon

Previous Entry Forwarding Report from Zummon Jun. 17th, 2005 @ 07:00 am Next Entry
Much delayed report back.

Per our contract (exhibit A) I've have been working as an Institute
(sssh!) contractor, and while the details of our mutual obligation
tend to be a bit fuzzy (do, I'm sure to my insufficient security
clearance), I've endeavored to preform adequately (and am expecting a
good letter of recommendation for post-doc work once Gnomeragan U is
restored). Due to the unconscionably long period between publishing
(having spent more time perishing them publishing of late), this
report back will be abbreviated for clarity (and due to having
insufficiently worked out the kinks in my memory enhancement device
[see Overspark et co, 2132])

Following suggestions from Quatherine, I spent considerably time
exploring and mining the Silverstream mines. I think it is important
to note that dwarven biology shows an uncharacteristically creative
flair, in that "Tunnel Rats" are not actually rats at all, but rather
surprisingly a form of kobold, and utterly immune to my attempts to
feed them rat poison. Do to several rather unfortunate incidents (do
you have any idea how hard it is to feed a "rat" strychnine when it
swings a pickaxe at your head?) I suggest we should send biology
professors to the Ironforge Mountaineer academy immediately by way of
humanitarian aid.

Following the unexpectedly exciting times at Silverstream, Nabulesto
and I had several very productive sessions at the Ironband's
excavation site, where we, dare I say, perfected Little Brothers's
[earlier documented
strategies](http://www.livejournal.com/community/gnomesrushin/9396.html).
A short pamphlet and poster series will be forthcoming.

On behalf of Nab and myself I would like to formally file a complaint
against whomever decided that gnomish magic users should be barred
from the use of some of the fruits of our labor, namely really big
guns. I feel this is once again an example of the overprotectiveness
of our dwarven hosts. You would think no one had blown up their
capital city before the way they carry on. A petition will be
circulating.

A brief visit to Stormwind furnished me with a very flashy cutlass,
and a Master Wu who was kind enough to train me to use it. I think
I'm am now the very picture of a pirate captain. (Wu thought
differently pointing out that goggles and a prairie chicken are not
quite an eye patch and parrot, I asked if he was an expert on
**gnomish** pirate garb, and if so if he could please furnish a
bibliography on the subject, which showed him I thought)

Continuing farther a field falling rumors of the "motherload" (a
curious word whose derivation seems to be totally lost, though a clue
I found when researching primitive superstitions among Westfall
farming peasants bears further examination) led me to explore the
"lost" mine of Moonbrook. Apparently "roads paved with gold" was
hyperbole, and I'll be speaking sharply to General Marcus Jonathan
about his poetic license. Additionally "lost" seems to be an
overstatement as the place was crawling with hard working miners, not
to mention flightly nightelves who seemed to be determined to
interrupt the mining process. I did however meet the famous
philanthropist VanCleef, and he seemed to be very interested in
providing the venture capital to back several daring investigative
lines of inquiry. (I'm worried that others might get to him first,
Westfall seems to be a hotbed of entrepreneurs, constantly asking for
help with "VC")

I trust the steady stream of metal, gems (except for the handful of
Tigereyes which got um, lost, when Trixie, I mean Master Engineer
Quikswitch, dared me...um... I think that is all classified
actually), and magical items is up to expectation. (please see first
paragraph regarding letter of recomendation)
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